Witness The Incredible.

Stop working so hard to lose them. Please. I beg you. Your body is already beautiful.

simonefiasco:

• home alone
• home alone 2: lost in new york
• elf
• a christmas story
• love actually
• the muppet christmas carol
• four christmases
• the santa clause
• a charlie brown christmas

some of my favorite Christmas movies

ALL OF THESE.

All of ya’ll know who they are. Those guys who try just a little too hard when they’re trying to get at a girl. Females, I’m sure every single one of you has had one of them. As a real dude, I mock them every time I see them. It’s just straight up hilarious. Fellas, you gotta quit with that shit. It’s not cool. Yes, it worked on the immature, high school girls. Yenno why? Cause they’re immature. They’re attracted by texting her every second, teasing her, and acting like you’re 14. It doesn’t work on the grown females. You gotta make the transition. Once females hit a certain age, they realize that the stuff that used to be cute, ain’t so cute anymore. Trying so hard will just annoy the shit out of her. She’ll think you’re a nuisance. You gotta give her space. Real queens need time by themselves, their girlfriends, hell other dudes. They don’t NEED you texting them 24/7. They don’t need you IM-ing them every single time you see them online. You don’t need to constantly ask, “What’re you doing right now?” or “Wanna hang out?”. Give her room to breathe. GIVE THE FEMALES THEIR SPACE. Damn. lol.

My head-game is on point. Real talk, no lie.

I’ve had a ridiculously fast metabolism my entire life. And suddenly I gain 10 pounds over the last 4 months? And it’s all going straight to my stomach, which is starting to look like a mini beer-belly. FRESHMAN 15 IS REAL! AGGGHHHHH -____- 

And yet, I’m currently single and I’ve only had one relationship in my whole life, which only lasted 3 months. Lol. *shrugs*. I guess I just know how people think.

You can’t be too easy, but you also can’t play too hard to get. Need a nice medium, in between, please. Too easy will allow him to treat you like a bitch. But too hard to get will drive a nigga crazy and make him give up. Act like you’re a queen, but also don’t take yourself too seriously. A man should be a gentleman, but he’s not gonna wait on you hand-and-foot. A queen, with some independence, and the ability to laugh at herself/take care of a man when he needs it. That’s what ALL males want.

I find it EXTREMELY annoying when someone tries to flaunt how smart they are. It’s like, shut the fuck up. Acting like you know everything, pffft. Your 2 cent opinion doesn’t need to interrupt every little thing I say. You’re not smart, you just read a lot of shit on the internet and think you know what’s up. Really, you don’t. People who are really intelligent, don’t have to show it off every 5 seconds. That’s called wisdom, you should learn some of it. Knowledge + wisdom = true intelligence. Knowledge + arrogance = dumbass posing as an intelligent person. 

I mean, damn. Calm your tits, people. It’s not like those were life-or-death messages. The world is still gonna keep spinning without them. Yeeeesh.

Then stop liking and laughing at their stupid jokes! Females always be saying it’s cute when a guy does a corny-ass, lame, stupid joke. That’s giving him permission to be stupid! He thinks being stupid will make you want him. Females, you reap what you sow. *shrugs*

• Stop worrying so much about everything. A little ignorance really is bliss.